If it can happen, it will (usually)...
1. The farther it is to the next gas stop, the larger the bug that will hit your shield exactly on the sight line.
These may help... Cycle Wipes
Effective, specially formulated wet wipes for cleaning bugs and grime from visors, shields and bikes. Convenient 12-count re-sealable travel pack stores easily in a pocket or tank bag. The ultra soft, lint-free mesh fabric pre-moistened towelettes are a durable, safe and ammonia free way to wipe helmets, visors and windscreens. They are also perfect for cleaning up your bug blasted headlights and turn signals. Pack of 12 wipes.
2. When you dry out after riding through some rain, it will start raining again just when you begin to feel comfortable.
These may help... Aerostich Always-Ready Boot Raincovers
Practical and lightweight, these ripstop nylon raincovers self-store in a small, flat pocket that secures via hook and loop to the inside shin area of the R-3, R-3 Light, Classic Roadcrafter, AD1 and Darien Suits and pants. The integrated storage makes them super easy to put on and ensures they are always ready when you need them. 7"×6.5" . M (7–9), L (10–12), XL (13–14).
3. The chance that your bike insurer will find out about that big ticket received in a non-reciprocal state is about 100%.
This may help... Radar Detector Remote Visual Alert
You’ll never miss this bright 3-LED flash when a signal is detected. Adjustable brightness for day or night conditions. Plugs in to 3.5mm headphone jack on most brands of detectors. Water resistant and compact design can be mounted to any convenient visible location with included straps. 1.25"×.6", 8’ cord.
4. If you run out of gas, no matter which way you decide to push, the closest gas station will always be uphill and in the other direction. Corollary: The likelihood of running out increases when all of the nearby gas stations are closed.
This may help... E-Fill Siphon
A self-priming fuel transfer system. No matter where you are, this ultra compact system won’t leave you stranded for long. Throw away that length of gnarly old hose and safely siphon fuel from any gas-powered device without getting a mouthful of gas.
5. The chance of your helmet dropping hard onto the rough concrete or asphalt surface is proportional to its newness and expense.
This may help... Helmet/Jacket Lockstrap
Great for strapping helmet, jacket and other gear to your bike and ensuring it stays there. Locking carabiner means no keys to worry about. Full length steel braided cable runs through strap for added security. 2' long. Sold individually.
6. You only realize the bike's keys are in your pants pocket after you've put on all of your riding gear.
It's a good thing Aerostich suits have... Flap covered hip-side zippers
Access your keys, wallet, chapstick, etc, through one of the hip-side zippers integrated into all our main riding gear.
7. The more riders around, the more likely you will:
- Forget the kill switch is in the off position while trying to start your bike;
- Ride off with the sidestand down;
- Ride off with the petcock closed;
- Ride along for miles with the turn signal on;
- Get stung by a bee and do a roadside crazy dance shedding your riding gear.
These may help... BeeSting Ampules
After doing said crazy dance, apply one of these disposable swabs. They contain enough Benzocaine to immediately relieve the searing pain so you can ride onward enjoying the rest of the day.
8. Your battery will die at the exact same time something else on the bike breaks and you will think they are related.
This may help... Compact Digital Voltmeter
Know the health of your bikes charging system in real-time with this compact, waterproof, digital voltmeter. Reads tenths of a volt (12.6, 12.7, 12.8, etc) and is easy to install. Compact, easy to read, waterproof, vibration proof and dust proof.
9. Your first successful multi-gear wheelie will be past a heretofore unobserved police officer who dislikes motorcycles.
See #3 above...
10. A bad day of riding is better than a good day at work.
This may help... You Are Traffic T-Shirt
If you are not moving, get a motorcycle and break free. Make your commute better. Make your day better. Make your world better. Make a statement and ride there. Rain. Shine. Hot. Cold. It's all better. Made in USA. 100% Cotton. M-XXL. White.
They left out a rule: There will always be a bystander to witness your failure when you do a low-speed, left-hand turn in gravel and your bike decides to lay down on its side, take a nap and break your shifter peg.
Unintended Wheelie for me. Mad at an inattentive auto driver, revved the engine on my Buell to make a point as I was leaving the intersection, just as I was releasing the clutch. Huge wheelie followed by a very panicked crash back to earth. Smashed my super loud air horn (irony) and front fender into the tire. As a final insult, I burned the ?!!!!$? out of my right forearm on the exhaust header while reaching down to free the fender while on the side of the road. Boy did I look cool that day! Another reminder to stay calm no matter what the cagers do to you…
Not I but from my bike owners forum.. rev the heck out of it at a stop light just to make some noise and accidentally drop the clutch. Then stand there as the bike shoots across the intersection to crash on the other side… walk of shame followed.
11) There is a sheetrock screw with your name all over it the split second you mount those nice, nubby, brand-spankin’-new tires.
Remember the first (and last) time you Armor-All’ed your seat?
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